This week I’ve been thinking a lot about internal chemistry and time. I try to start and end my days at the same time e.g. in bed by 12 am and up by 8 or 9—even on the weekends. From the ages of 18-21 this was not the case. I was always up until 3 or 4 am on the weekends, 1 am on the weekdays, but somehow always up for class by 7 or 8 am. I had no idea how much happier and efficient I could be if I changed some of my habits.
I mentioned on one of my Instagram stories that I don’t go out anymore. I made an exception this weekend for a birthday and a friend that was in town from NYC. Since I don’t drink, I gravitate towards coffee and Diet Coke (poison, I know, but let me just have this one) to get energy to stay out and socialize. Even though I got home by a reasonable hour, I couldn’t fall asleep until 3-4 am. My body chemistry was thrown completely out of order and it truly took a toll on my productivity. This made me realize—people do this every weekend. How much more productive could we be as people, friends and citizens if we used moderation? How much happier could we be? Surely less irritable.
I was pissed about my lack of productivity over these few days which made me weep over spilled milk: lost time. This week I’m focusing on setting a new intention every day. We have no control over what happened yesterday or what will happen tomorrow. Why do we get annoyed at ourselves about the choices we made yesterday? Time isn’t cyclical—yesterday is gone. Perhaps to make the mistake more salient in our memory in order to avoid repeating it. But this turns into shame and anger for me. From the moment you wake up everyday until the moment you fall asleep is all on you. Our actions should align with our values—values of making sure we finish our to do lists, lose a few pounds, etc. Each step you take is a choice. I came across this quote that resonated with me:
“Don’t think about what can happen in a month. Don’t think about what can happen in a year. Just focus on the 24 hours in front of your and do what you can to get closer to where you want to be.”
Be mindful of your actions and ask yourself, “will this take me in the direction I want to go?”